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Good morning, friends, and blessings of love , grounding, and gentleness (per our message last Monday) to you in this new week…
How did last week’s experiment go in being gentle, trying softer? 💛 I hope it’s one you’re continuing…gentleness is truly strength, and takes so much intentionality, doesn’t it? It is so counter-cultural, and yet it’s what everything and everyone around us is desperately needing….
Speaking of the counter-cultural — I promised I would return with some reflections on the theme of Inner Voice — a topic I focused upon in the most recent women’s retreat I led. The power of listening to and living by the Inner Voice is something I’ve been reflecting on in my own heart for a number of years. I’ve realized afresh how challenging this is in a culture conditioning us to live by what’s placed upon us — roles, responsibilities, expectations, standards — rather than what’s within us.
There are all kinds of names for this beautiful center in you — the Inner Voice, the True Self, God’s very presence inside… I believe they are all one in the same. It is the treasure of who you really are, fashioned by God’s hands. The voice you listen to but also the voice you use. I love St. Catherine of Genoa’s declaration, “My deepest me is God!”
It’s a treasure that’s been there from the start, and will always be there, but for many of us, becomes quite buried. We lose sense and sight of it. And seeking to reclaim and bring it out can actually feel quite scary.
I was with a dear friend a couple years ago on a Midwestern winter afternoon with the wind whipping outside and our hands wrapped around big mugs of steamy coffee inside. More than words shared were the tears.
“I have lived for years,” she said, “trying to take care of other people and be what they needed me to be or what they want me to be. I’m not even sure right now who I am.”
She paused, and took in breath while the tears continued to come.
“Now that my kids are growing and I’m getting older, I am terrified that as I come back to myself, that I will be me, and that people aren’t going to like that me.”
I remember looking at my remarkable friend, knowing there was nothing I could say and no reassurance I could give to unlock the bind of these fears. That she was the only one with keys for that.
And that I had my own set of keys for my own same fears.
Is this not one of the most foundational worries we carry? That we can’t be who we are? Or don’t know who we really are? That we are somehow missing what we are actually meant to be doing here?
The longer we live, the more we accumulate layer upon layer of messaging informing who we should be. What will bring success in others eyes…what will help us feel a sense of belonging.
But it makes me wonder, who were you before you were told who to be? Or should be? Or allowed to be?
Kids, especially very young children, are experts at all this Inner Voice stuff. They know what they want, and they express that. So why is it that by the time we are young adults (or often earlier!) it can feel nearly impossible to name both who we are (not defined by a role or what we do) and what we want? Both those things are intrinsically tied together. Two sides of the same coin.
So here’s my mini-Inner-Voice-challenge for you sometime this week. Pull out a pen and something to write on (which, did you know some of the best and most brilliant ideas have begun on napkins?) and answer the following prompts…
I am….
I want….
Know the Holy Spirit is going to be flowing through the words you write in those dots. Let Her speak. And let yourself maybe even be surprised.
A Prayer
A prayer about cultivating our true essence, listening to the Inner Voice, and asking for God’s love and strength to nurture the gift inside of us. From my book Ash and Starlight: Prayers for the Chaos and Grace of Daily Life, Second Edition…
When I need to get back to the basics
Tender One,
How blessed I am, God, to have
your love, your peace, your reassurance –
you give me the comfort I need
to live my hardest days.
How blessed I am, God, to have
your strength, your courage, your self-control –
you give me the determination I need
to make tough decisions and follow through.
How blessed I am, God, to have
your grace, your forgiveness, your promise of new life –
you give me the mercy I need
to say, “I’ll make different choices today,”
and then do so.
You see me, God, as I truly am –
the core that’s been there since
I was a baby and blossomed as a child.
A core buried beneath all of these layers.
A layer of responsibility here and layer of image there…
the layers of expectations others place on me…
the layers of self-doubt and fear.
Please help me shed the layers, God,
and return to the core.
Help me reclaim who I truly am –
the person you’ve created me to be.
May I live boldly,
speak confidently,
love unconditionally,
forgive readily,
and trust deeply.
Shape my life to match my soul.
With refreshed honesty
about myself and my heart,
I thank you for loving me as I am.
I embrace my true essence
and your work for me today.
Amen.
Psalm 139:13 * Philippians 4:19 * 2 Timothy 1:6
“Rekindle the gift of God that is within you…”
- 2 Timothy 1:6
Something that nourished me recently…
*The muse of some favorite artists…I can’t remember the last time I went to the Art Institute of Chicago and I had the great joy of wandering the rooms last week with my friend, Traci (speaking of treasure, you must check out her Treasure Box Tuesdays!). A little Georgia O’Keeffe and Claude Monet were just what my spirit needed…
*Colorstrology! My husband took our bigger two kids to the Color Factory of Chicago recently and one of the delightful discoveries was how every birth date has its own color. We got cards for each of the birthdays in our family, and I learned there is even a book on the topic. I found it ironic my shade is “glass of merlot” since I don’t drink anymore. 😂
*Strong back, soft front, wild heart playlist…A nod to Brene Brown’s coining of this beautiful phrase. I started my own playlist here for songs to ground myself. How about for you? Any suggestions?
*Burley is back out….Even those who can pedal themselves like a ride…who wouldn’t?
Ash and Starlight, plus other good things…
*SECOND EDITION OF ASH AND STARLIGHT ~ Find the updated edition of my book here at Chalice or at the Amazon link!
*MONDAY MANNA ARCHIVES ~ You can view previous Monday Manna reflections here, or for the really old stuff, go to my website.
*WHAT DOES MANNA MEAN? ~ Check out an earlier post to learn how this little bit of “daily bread” got its name…
More to come on that Inner Voice within you, friends. And in the meantime, pause to let your true self come through, and find that napkin…
Love and Light,
Arianne
I love hearing from you! You are manna. Reply to this note to send a message directly to my inbox.
I love the butterflies you’ve added to your flowerscapes.
Perhaps reaching out to or responding to every person we meet throughout each day from the spirit of God within us, is more important than whether we do it as a partner, a parent, a doctor, a mechanic, a teacher, a musician, a shopkeeper, a receptionist, or any other role we are coming from at the time.
Last week I was feeling frustrated and foolish because I had backed into a neighbor’s car that was in our driveway.
The owner of a dent repair shop reassured me that I wasn’t alone. He pointed, in turn, to three other vehicles that were awaiting repairs and said, “That one - backed into a trash can. That one - backed into a trash can. That one - also back into a trash can.
He truly helped me stop beating myself up, listening and responding to me from the spirit of God within.
Have you read any of Elizabeth Gilbert’s Letter from Love? I haven’t, but I heard her describe the practice on the Good Life Project podcast and am intrigued. Lovely conversation.