Monday Manna
Let's feel what we couldn't feel...
Thank you so much, my friend, for subscribing to Monday Manna. I’m so glad and humbled you are here. My prayer with this little pause on Monday mornings is to offer some nourishment (“manna”) for you — via my reflection, prayer, and painting — as you are nourishing the world around you. Together, we are watching for the ways God is with us and for us as we take one day at a time…
Good morning, friends, and much gentleness to you and all you hold as we begin a new week ~
I was lying on the therapy/massage table for another session with my “healer,” as I call him. With injury after injury this year in my running, I had come to *D* quite a bit, especially for my sprained ankle in the last month. It wasn’t too long after that, though, when some significant pain in my glute and hamstring developed.
Me: Do you think it’s from my leg weights? (I had decided earlier that week I could do all kinds of squats and lifts after not doing much of these for years).
*D*: (No chance to respond because I just kept rattling things off…)
Me: Or maybe it’s from compensating with my ankle?
*D*: (still not able to get a word in)
Me: Do you think I was moving differently to protect my ankle and that caused this pain in my glute? Which thing do you think it could be???
*D*: (Without missing a beat after I made a pause) “I think it’s from stress.”
Me: Ohhhhhhhh……….*silence* (Here comes the internal cascade of feelings as I thought about my mom, an unexpected health challenge with one of our kids, and *all the things*)
*D*: The body follows the mind.
Me: More silence…thinking….feeling….
*D*: Your body is trying to do you a favor. It’s giving you this pain so you don’t have to think and feel all those things that are distressing you….
Me: 🤯
***
This experience on the healing table was yet another moment in the last month pointing a laser beam on the importance of emotional health. Our bodies will never lie to us, and when we aren’t facing and feeling what we need to, they will find a way to make us face and feel it. What is going on in our minds directly impacts our emotions and our bodies.
I was reading an article the other day that shared as high as 75-90% of sickness and disease somehow starts with the way we manage our emotions and stress. We like to think we don’t have to tend to our emotional health, but it is another area of our overall wellbeing that asks for just as much intentionality as any other part. Our family knows….
I myself was diagnosed with an anxiety disorder pretty early on in life. And a few years ago, my husband went on medical leave from his pastoral role to do a depression recovery outreach program. Emotional health really is life or death.
(Note: While “emotional health” and “mental health” are sometimes used interchangeably, emotional health is more of an aspect of mental health. I do think that our thoughts and feelings, though, get pretty interlaced. We must detach from the thoughts we are having that create a swirl of stress within us. And we must recognize that we don’t have to act on our feelings, we just need to honor them. And feel them.)
I also read this quote the other day:
Everything that you want, dream, desire, achieve, miss, fail, or fumble starts with the stability of your mind. ~ Lawana Gladney
Now, obviously, there is much that happens to us — bodies, minds, and spirits — that is beyond our control. But, I have recently found the Spirit gently calling me back to greater intentionality in how I am caring for my mind and heart. My husband and I have been among the many people in our community saying they’re waking up early with anxiety in the chest. Maybe it’s because ICE was ramping up its efforts even more. Maybe it’s the uncertainty and untenability of our governmental landscape. Maybe it’s something in the air.
We are already in a crucible of a time as a country, but we are now also entering the holiday season, which can be the most intense time of the year for many. Expectations. Travel. Extra commitments. Events. Did I mention expectations?
So, to return to my healer, *D*, and another thing he said near the end of our session. “I think the world is going to heal by everyone taking responsibility for their own minds and inner experiences.”
I think that starts with fixing our eyes and minds on Jesus, taking deep breaths, focusing our energy toward what we can control, and pulling out a pen (in addition to regular therapy, medication, and other supports, all of which have been integral to my experience). I myself have been especially appreciating these “Journal Prompts to Support your Emotional Health” from Onsite Therapy and Wellness Center. I’ll share a handful of them here with hopes you will care for yourself in this way. As one of my favorite Sara Groves songs says, “Let’s feel what we couldn’t feel…know what we cannot know…heal where we couldn’t heal…let’s be a miracle.”
Give yourself ten minutes, ask God to bring light and sit with you, and write out one of these…
*Fill a page with things that make you happy. You can do this as a list or as drawings.
*What does it look like when your emotional wellness is off-kilter? What are common indicators that you are under stress, exhausted, or depressed? What types of things help you when you’re feeling this way?
*Make a list of five difficult things you’ve overcome. Next to each item, identify the characteristic(s) that you developed through this experience.
*What emotion(s) are you feeling right now? Where do you feel that feeling(s)? On a scale of 1-10, how strong is each emotion? What is this emotion telling you about your current circumstances?
*With whom do you feel most like yourself? What is it about those people that make you feel safe and free to show up as you are? What places do you feel most like yourself? What is it about those places that make you feel safe and free to show up as you are?
*What are five things you are grateful for today?
*Describe your 8-year-old self. What did you love? What did you hate? What did you want to become someday?
*Set a timer for 10 minutes and write whatever comes through your head. No editing, no erasing, just let it flow.
*Write about the last time you laughed until you cried.
*What is one toxic thing, habit, or person that you feel the need to let go of?
*What ten words best describe you at your best?
A Prayer
This prayer is perfect for all the emotions we feel and hold, reminding us they all belong. Even what seems like opposite emotions, or a paradox of emotions, seamlessly hold together in the gentle hands of God who holds all those emotions with us. Here is a prayer for “When I’m a Paradox of Feelings,” from my book, Ash and Starlight: Prayers for the Chaos and Grace of Daily Life, Second Edition.
When I’m a paradox of feelings
Sweet Spirit,
How grateful I am for
your companionship
in all I feel and hold.
Sometimes I feel unglued,
going in so many directions
and yearning for centeredness
amid the clamor.
Sometimes I feel bored stiff,
weighed down by the
heavy sameness of
my days and my choices.
Sometimes I feel strong and grateful,
amazed at the sweetness
in this season of life.
Sometimes I feel self-pitying,
sad that another week passed
without a phone call from family
or invitation from a friend.
Sometimes I feel consumed with worry—
people who need help,
people making sad choices,
people I feel responsible for,
people I don’t understand
(or don’t understand me).
You beautifully seam my paradoxes,
grounding both my
flurry and emptiness,
my worry and joy,
in your heart.
Help me give each of
these feelings their place—
to honor them,
accept them,
and with a breath of release,
blow away the ones no longer needed.
I praise you, Loving Spirit,
for the fresh energy and freedom you offer.
Thank you for living within me,
breathing your peace and power
into the bottom of my being.
It is not by my own abilities but by you
that I live out my calling.
I ask for your support to be with me,
for you are my Source of true strength.
You have been and will be with me —
in the variety of unique
circumstances and challenges I face.
I open my arms and eyes
with the acceptance you’re teaching me…
Amen.
Psalm 20:7 * Psalm 41:12 * Zechariah 4:6
“You know me inside and out, you hold me together…”
—Psalm 41:12 (The Message)
Something that nourished me recently…
*I read these quotes from Mister Rogers last month and copied them down into my journal. I returned to them again the other day…Thank you, God, for Mister Rogers.
*Getting this photo from a supporting subscriber of Monday Manna with her holiday downloadable I sent out last week to paid subscribers already printed and framed. Doesn’t it look absolutely perfect with the globe? She has the artistic eye! It’s not too late to get this download if you become a paid subscriber before Christmas. :)
*First snowfall!
Ash and Starlight, plus other good things…
* MY ETSY SHOP ~ A separate email will be coming on Wednesday with a list of fun things in my Etsy Shop in time for the holidays, including CLOTHES!! :) Everything meets my criteria of the C’s — Comfy, Cozy, and Colorful! I have a number of sweatshirts, t-shirts, kids’ clothes, yoga leggings, and the dress I wore for my art show! I’ve had a lot of fun wearing them already as I’ve tested out products. A portion of each sale here goes to World Central Kitchen which provides food relief, especially urgent right now with the SNAP defunding. You can view the shop here. Here’s a sneak peek of some of what’s to come, with lots more to see in a couple days. The new listings will go live on Wednesday.
*SECOND EDITION OF ASH AND STARLIGHT ~ Find the updated edition of my book here at Chalice or at the Bookshop link.
*MONDAY MANNA ARCHIVES ~ Monday Manna each week is free! Paid supporters of Monday Manna can view previous Monday Manna reflections here, or for the really old stuff, go to my website.
*WHAT DOES MANNA MEAN? ~ Check out an earlier post to learn how this little bit of “daily bread” got its name…
I’ll be sending my holiday Etsy shop update on Wednesday, but won’t have a Monday Manna next week due to some travel and commitments. I’ll be back as we begin Advent! Wishing all of you a beautiful and blessed Thanksgiving with room and reverence for all your emotions. I have long loved Isaiah 26:3 — “You keep in perfect peace those whose minds are set on you.” Let’s set our minds and hearts in the right place this week, friends, and keep feeling our feelings.
Love and Light,
Arianne
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