Monday Manna
What has my attention? What needs my attention?
Good morning, friends, and deep stillness and grounding to you as we start a fresh week ~
Perhaps some of you have heard of the book, Theo of Golden, which is all the talk with book clubs and beyond. When a friend dropped a copy on my doorstep that’d been passed along, I did not foresee how this book would rewire me in some deep ways. As an English Lit major in college, I’ve read a lot of novels. But this one…..this one may be one of my favorites I’ve ever read.
I’m not going to delve into the story and many themes of this profound book — I may save that for another post — but one of the main gifts it blesses the reader with is the call to pay attention. In the character of Theo — a humble, devoted, loving man who is both entirely beloved and complete mystery to those around him, we learn how taking the time to truly look, to pay close attention, and to give whomever you are with and wherever you are your pure presence are the foundation to a fulfilling life.
I found myself simultaneously inspired and greatly challenged by this thematic thread, woven throughout the book’s entirety. I was reminded of another writer I love, and I know many of you do, too…Mary Oliver. She has sometimes been nicknamed the “patron saint of paying attention.” There are many invitations throughout her poetry to take a spacious, slow approach to life, and how the way we do this is through paying attention. A couple of favorite quotes…
***
“Attention is the beginning of devotion….” *
and
“To pay attention — this is our endless and proper work.”**
and this beautiful pairing of prayer and attention…
“I don't know exactly what a prayer is.
I do know how to pay attention, how to fall down
into the grass, how to kneel down in the grass,
how to be idle and blessed, how to stroll through the fields,
which is what I have been doing all day.
Tell me, what else should I have done?
Doesn't everything die at last, and too soon?
Tell me, what is it you plan to do
with your one wild and precious life?”***
***
While I oftentimes do not think about this, to pay attention is to give and offer the most precious part of ourselves. As Simone Weil said, “attention is the purest form of generosity.” There is nothing more valuable we could give.
This is what we see again and again in the character of Theo, who is continually looking at things closely — nature, art, people, listening carefully to those he is with, seemingly never hurried or preoccupied.
And, of course, we find no better model of this than Jesus, who was always in the moment, and time and again, embracing of interruptions. We also learn so much through watching where Jesus places his attention. One of my favorite stories from the Gospels, shared in Matthew, Mark, and Luke, is that of Jesus welcoming the little children. Jesus was right in the midst of teaching parables to the crowds when some anxious parents started bringing kids, “even infants” Luke says, to Jesus that “he might touch them.” These were children in need of healing, likely ones pushed even further to the margins. And the disciples — the people who were supposed to understand what Jesus was all about — started pushing the children and parents away. Jesus was in the middle of something! Something more important! Or so they thought.
Jesus calls for the children and opens his arms, saying, “let the little children come to me, and do not stop them; for it is to such as these that the kingdom of God belongs.” ****
Perhaps this was also Jesus’ way of saying children are the best teachers in how we are to pay attention, where we are to place our attention, and how we are to live. If you’ve spent even three minutes with a young child, you know they are experts at being present to what they are doing. I’m reminded of a comment someone once said to me in watching my then four-year-old engrossed play, one thing to the next, not a care in the world. “He is pure and 100% NOW!” they said.
In this season, I am especially hungering and yearning for this kind of posture to life — it may be why Theo reverberated in my soul at such a deep level. More recently, I have found myself so much more distracted and internally divided. It feels like when stress or fatigue (or both!) rise, my attention goes from deep and steady to shallow and flittering.
And I am ashamed to say my habits around my phone have been an enormous piece of that (my kids will be the first to tell you!). It was interesting to learn in an interview with the author of Theo, Allen Levi, that he was very intentional about the absence of technology, particularly phones, in the book. There are only two occurrences in the entire story which mention a phone, and both of them are disturbing and times you go ugh….
Speaking of that interview, I was listening to it on some earbuds outside, and while doing so, saw three different people walking their dogs. Each of them had one hand on the leash, and one holding a phone up to their faces. It was a beautiful spring day, and I made my way past a park bench overlook by Lake Michigan where a woman sat with a very young child, an expansive view of the lake right before them. She was not looking at the child. Not looking at the lake. She was looking at her phone.
And lest we think I am judging, there I was, on my phone as well, listening to the interview instead of taking those few moments outside to listen for what was around me, or what might be stirring around within me.
I need some more Mary Oliver. Some more Theo. Some more Jesus.
I will leave you with two powerful questions my friend and mentor, Nancy, taught me some time ago which I am coming back to, time and time again, right now...
What has my attention?
What needs my attention?
Asking these questions throughout our day will keep us awake, aware, and empowered. And it is a ritual, this coming back to attention, over and over again. Like we learn through meditation, the moments of distraction are all part of it. It’s the coming back that becomes the anchoring beat. Because we know, to pay attention…this is our endless work.
And what we practice grows stronger.
*From Mary Oliver’s Upstream: Selected Essays
**From Mary Oliver’s poem, “Yes! No!” in White Pine: Poems and Prose Poems
****From Mary Oliver’s poem, “Summer Day,” in New and Selected Poems, Volume 1
****From Luke 18:15-17
Note: It was just a little over a year ago I shared a meaningful conversation with MaryAnn McKibben Dana on the topic of presence (you can watch it here). In it we talked a lot about how presence/attention is something we continually practice throughout the day, how presence helps us navigate the state of the world, and the mantra I tell myself throughout the day to bring me back to the present (i.e. “I’m doing this now…”)
Another note: I really wish I could have been in Frances Wattman Rosenau book club on this book, but check out her post about the book, “How to Break Up With Your Phone.”
A Prayer
This prayer from my book, Ash and Starlight, is for all of us needing to breathe, come back to God’s peace in this moment, and ground our attention in the goodness right here.
When I’m completely scattered
Centering and calming God,
Sometimes my mind is
both everywhere and nowhere at all.
I’m filled with such a mess of tasks,
reminders, and to-do alerts,
all pinging against the walls of my head.
I ask for your peace-giving guidance
to place these thoughts
where they ought to be today.
Every tiny thing in my life
looms seemingly large,
while the assignments,
relationships, and worries
engulf me.
Help me put aside what can wait,
letting what needs my attention
receive action it deserves.
Help me sort this out.
Slow down my breathing,
reminding me when
I’ve been a ball of anxiety before
and you’ve untangled
my life, my worries…
Give me space to remember these things
zipping within are not my life,
but small slices of it—
I’ll take them on as I’m able,
one at a time (with you by my side).
With your holy breath, clear my mind...
With your purifying Spirit, cleanse my soul...
With your gentle presence, calm my heart...
Help me, God, in the confusion or the jumble
to focus on what really, really, matters.
Thank you for the ways you
center me and bring me back to life—
to the real, the important, the true.
May I go about the rest of this day
focused on you and grounded in your peace—
peace deeper than my understanding.
Amen.
Isaiah 26:3 * Matthew 6:33 * Philippians 4:6–7
“Those of steadfast mind you keep in peace—
in peace because they trust in you.”
—Isaiah 26:3
Something that nourished me recently…
*I celebrated turning 41, and am so deeply grateful. These years are ones marked by so much goodness and so much grief, and I am grateful for every one of them. My husband was on a ten-day trip to Greece with a pastoral cohort, a footsteps of the apostle Paul tour, and he arrived home at 11:58 p.m. on my birthday. A great gift. :) Knowing he’d be gone, friends at church had surprised me that evening with gluten free ice cream cake, and that was a tender and sweet gift in so many ways. (Also, I learned for the first time that my birthday, April 15, is also World Art Day! That completely delighted me!)
*More painting with the kids…I shared in the last post some daffodils I had fun painting with my son, and then recently, my daughter and I enjoyed painting this lavender plant.
*Our church hosted a “Sing for Peace” gathering last week that was so meaningful. Inspired by both the Buddhist monks doing their “walk for peace,” as well as the many gatherings for singing and song in MN surrounding the ICE events, this community sing along was a powerful reminder of how peace begins.
Ash and Starlight, plus other good things…
* MY ETSY SHOP ~ New things are on the Etsy site! Supporting subscribers of Monday Manna receive a 25% off discount code for all prints and originals until the end of April. Let me know if you didn’t receive last week’s email with the code! Here’s a chance to get something for Mother’s Day, teacher gifts, or celebrating the earth is coming back to life, and so are you! You can view the shop here . This month I will send a portion of sales in my Etsy shop to Feed My Starving Children. Here’s a sneak peek of a few of the new listings…
*SECOND EDITION OF ASH AND STARLIGHT ~ Find the updated edition of my book here at Chalice or at the Bookshop link.
*MONDAY MANNA ARCHIVES ~ Monday Manna each week is free! Supporting supporters of Monday Manna can view previous Monday Manna reflections here, or for the really old stuff, go to my website.
*WHAT DOES MANNA MEAN? ~ Check out an earlier post to learn how this little bit of “daily bread” got its name…
Remember friends, energy flows where attention goes. And keep asking those questions…what has my attention? What needs my attention? We will practice together…
Love and Light,
Arianne
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Good morning friend. Thank you for this today. There’s a good chance you’re going to see yourself quoted in my next post on Wednesday. It feels that the universe has been saying a lot of things to me recently about paying attention. Thank you for sharing this today.